Something about sun, sea and sightseeing makes holidays kryptonite for friends. Suzie Coen shares how to deal with the drama.
Right. No point beating about the bush on this one: there are a handful of people in the world whom you can go on holiday with and guarantee to have an enjoyable time, though not all at once. Naturally, this rule only applies if you are over 30. If you’re in your twenties, you want Love Island numbers, an injection of new blood at half-time and mattress-strewn living quarters.
Once you get over 35, the six of the best rule has kicked in. You’ve probably just identified your top holiday buddies, but back up a bit. Don’t assume good friends automatically make ideal holiday companions. They don’t.
There is no end of potential incompatibility issues, so your mates must pass these holiday tests up front.
Sunbathers or other
You don’t need to sunbathe to be a sunbather type. Sunbathers are natural loungers. They are big believers in siestas, long lunches, horizontal reading, hammocks, eating at 10pm, and a bit of a lie-in. Others will be enrolled in the kitesurfing classes and the kayaking experience, and will rise early to join the cycling club. Sunbathers and others can get on, provided the others are (a) not in any sense occupying the moral high ground and (b) prepared to relax and lash into the rosé come sundown.
The craic
What are they up for? Music and finding the weird bar with the topless waiters or board games, fresh mint tea and an early night? Realistically, everyone must be in the same place on the decadence spectrum – there are few things more destructive on holiday than the person who raises an eyebrow and says, “You’re ordering another round of ouzo?”. You want to be crystal clear on this one.
Authentic vs nice
Every group holiday has an Aoife (let’s call her Aoife) who is well-travelled, fears being identified as a tourist (to the point of fainting if handed an English menu) and considers it a point of honour to seek out the most authentic, known-only-to-the-locals places to eat and drink. Great, unless anywhere twinkly and near to the seafront is rejected as a matter of course and you’re spending every night sitting cross-legged on a rug under an awning getting bitten to death while eating goat’s stew with the owner’s children watching you. Sometimes, you want an overpriced chilled white wine with a view of the sun setting, and you can cope if there are noisy “tourists” at the next table, because the food is amazing.
Money
Everyone must be on the same page about acceptable spending. Some people are happy to split the bill every time, while others will find subsidising your cocktail obsession or dessert addiction stressful. There’s an unstated mutual understanding that no one wants to be considered a tight-fisted saddo but that no one’s going to be taken for a ride, either. Have a plan, is all I’m saying.
Things to watch out for
Politics. No one ever took politics on holiday until last year and now it’s all you talk about, and it will get heated, even if you’re in agreement. Someone will say, “What people don’t understand”, and you’ll be off. Probably best to check you’re on the same side.
Borrowers
You’ve bothered to pack. Others have one book so need to ask for the one you were about to start, one suncream so need to use yours (more of an issue since you’ve switched to the hypoallergenic Australian one that costs a fiver a squirt), no phone charger, not enough vape liquid… A toxic trio. If The White Lotus taught us anything, it was this: never take a three-person girls’ trip. See? Worth doing your homework.
This article originally appeared in the Summer 2025 issue of IMAGE.
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