Many mums feel stuck between wanting ease and practicality, and wanting to feel put together and like themselves. A style expert explains how to align your wardrobe with the woman you are today.
For many women, getting dressed becomes just another task in an already full day. This is where Maria Macklin comes in. Through her work, she helps women reconnect with who they are now, and find joy in dressing again.
Blending psychology, colour analysis and deeply personal style work, she supports mothers to rediscover confidence in their clothes and, more importantly, in themselves. She sits down with Dominique McMullan.
Motherhood can completely shift how we see ourselves. How do you help women dress for who they are now?
The early days as a new parent can often be an intense crash course, making getting dressed far down the list. There are thousands of articles full of tips and tricks on how to dress as a new mum, and it can feel overwhelming. You can feel as lost as your little one’s sock in the wash or their favourite toy at bedtime.
During this new stage of life, you might have to be clever with your outfits to work around breastfeeding or those messy playground excursions, but that doesn’t mean you have to lose yourself in baggy clothing.
First, lean into your colours. Your comfies can still make you feel like you when you know your WOW colours. All my maternity wear and post-partum clothes were in my best colours and as close to my style as possible.
Being a mother is a wonderful privilege. Body changes, whether subtle or more pronounced, will be noticed by you, but rarely by anyone else. My clients know not to point out the one or two things they don’t like about themselves, but to focus on all the amazing things we have and are. Once we are comfortable in our own skin, that feeling is enhanced by choosing the best colours and styles not only for your body architecture but also for your personality. You’ll be proud to be you.
Would you consider dressing well a form of self-care?
Dressing well is a form of self-respect and self-expression. It is a way of saying, “I value myself, and I deserve to look and feel my best.” It is a silent affirmation of self-worth.
When that “self-worth” feels too hard, especially when you’ve nowhere to go or apart from the pick-ups or your daily walk, to get into clothes that are inevitably going to get dirty can be self-defeating. Ask yourself, “What’s the point of having them just sit in the wardrobe?”
Dressing well for no reason isn’t about what others think of you; for me, it is about standing out with an inner self-confidence. And that is good for you and your well-being.
Maria Macklin runs Ireland’s largest full-service Style Consultancy because I believe that when you are authentic in how you show up, you are unstoppable. You can get in touch with her through her website or on Instagram.
So many women feel caught between wanting to feel comfortable and wanting to feel put together and confident. Is it possible to do both?
Being comfortable is important. You lose energy and confidence when you’re distracted by your clothes. So much of the comfort comes from feeling like yourself, and playing your character rather than conforming to standards, trends, and what other people are doing. For some, comfort is a pretty blouse, fitted jeans, a belt and some sparkle in their runners; for others, it might be a mid-length swishy skirt, long boots, knitwear and a biker jacket. It’s so individual. You have to wear what’s right for you.
How do you help people visually align with their true, authentic selves?
At House of Colour, we use Carl Jung’s theory of body archetypes, from which we have 23 different “clothing personalities”. Each of these clothing personalities gives our clients a set of guidelines or a blueprint. With their blueprint, they will understand which of the fashion trends they should look at and which they should ignore. This work unlocks so many things for clients and often feels very emotional. Most often, they realise that they have been hiding, or wearing what everyone else is wearing, or wearing what the corporate norms are, rather than honouring who they are.
You have said wardrobes can end up full of “other people’s clothes”. What do you mean by that, and why is it such a common experience for mums?
We are constantly being bombarded by fashion and trend noise. There’s so much choice, overwhelm, advice and information about what we “should” be wearing this season, or at a certain age. Couple that with the vast amount of fast fashion drops tempting us into the next “thing”. It’s too easy to buy mindlessly without intention.
Mothers who are time poor and who don’t prioritise themselves rarely think strategically about their clothes shopping. They’re often picking up a piece while doing their food shopping. Or they might have a 20-minute gap in which to buy clothes, between a drop-off and a child collection. Buying under stress is the same as food shopping when hungry. It leads to a random, mediocre wardrobe rather than an intentional one which reflects you and serves you well. You don’t need more clothes, you need more of YOU in your clothes.
How can getting dressed become easier, not another thing on the to-do list, when you’re tired, time poor and caring for everyone else?
On average, women spend 17 minutes per day deciding what to wear. That equates to six months of a working life.
When your wardrobe is aligned with you and your lifestyle, then the decision fatigue and the overwhelm disappear. Rather than being a stress creator, it becomes a joyful door to open every morning.
Having a well-curated wardrobe, one which is in your colour palette and which reflects you and your lifestyle, will give you more choice and more outfits from fewer items. Mixing and matching becomes easy, eg, five tops and five bottoms will make 25 outfits – almost enough for an entire month. And the worst you’ll look is amazing, every single day.
You don’t need more clothes, you need more of YOU in your clothes.
What role does colour play in confidence, especially on the days when energy is low, and perhaps self-doubt is high?
We see colour first. It grabs attention and is used strategically in the world around us. Colour is very powerful as it can change a mood or express different feelings.
Saturated and brighter colours are more arousing and will give you more energy. Deep and dull colours have been found to induce tiredness.
Wearing long wavelength colours like red, orange and yellow activates sympathetic neurons in the autonomic nervous system (ANS), making you feel energetic and excited. Wearing short wavelength colours like blue, indigo and purple activate parasympathetic neurons in the ANS, which calm you down.
Colour not only changes what others see, but it also changes how you feel about yourself. Whether you wear a small amount of a bright colour or a jacket/trousers/dress in a brighter colour, you will feel more empowered and confident.
Is there a common mindset shift you see in clients once they stop trying to “fit in” and start dressing in a way that feels true to them?
When my clients understand their individual style blueprint, two things happen. First, they feel more confident and almost liberated from the “rules”, trends, and societal expectations of how they feel they need to be. Second, they feel like they’ve been given permission to be the person that they knew was there, but they were either too afraid or lacked the knowledge and the know-how to honour fully.
Many mums feel guilty investing time or money in themselves. How do you reframe that for your clients?
Whilst there is an initial cost to having colour and style consultations, the benefits are lifelong. Particularly with the cost-of-living crisis and rising childcare costs, you’ll save such a huge amount of money (and time) by knowing what suits you. You won’t waste money trying to buy more clothes to dress your changed body. You’ll thank your future self every time you get dressed.
Investing in yourself will also ripple out to how you care for others. Put on your own oxygen mask first, recharge your batteries; there are lots of analogies with which we’re all familiar. When you’re firing on all cylinders, everyone benefits.
If a woman feels invisible in this season of life, can clothing really help her feel seen again?
Your clothes can help you to either blend in or to stand out. I don’t know anyone, however, who likes to be ignored. Your clothes are your visual expression; they speak for you. First impressions occur in the blink of an eye. And the reaction, response, service you get from others will mirror that visual expression. When you stand out for all the right reasons, you’ll feel seen, heard and valued. You might add a colourful scarf, belt or jacket. And not only will you be more visible, but you’ll feel more confident.
What’s one small change a mum could make tomorrow that might help her feel more confident in her clothes straight away?
Buy a great top in one of your WOW colours and wear it on repeat!
Cheekily, I’ll add a second change. Chanel is famous for saying, “Before you leave the house, remove one accessory”. In this era of very casual dressing, I’m contradicting that statement by advising that one or two added accessories can add personality and will keep you looking visible and creative.
Ultimately, what do you hope women take away from working with you, beyond how they look?
Interestingly, I’ve discovered that how they look can become secondary to how they feel. For example, a pair of shorts might look fine on someone in terms of fit and colour, but when those shorts don’t align with who she is, they’ll make her feel like a boy scout.
When you look in the mirror, you should see you, rather than you in someone else’s clothes or a diluted version of you created in order to “fit in”. Feeling amazing gives you the freedom to shake off the shackles of other people’s opinions. My clients learn to take their space in their own way.
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