Back In Chelsea

Keeping up with the residents of SW3 can be a tad confusing – they all have the same hair – but in the end it is always culturally rewarding. In that it makes the Daily Mail homepage a lot easier navigate. While we’ve fallen in cute with the Mini in Chelsea trailer – the cast are replaced by cute mini versions, the perfect means to capture the childish antics of the Sloane Square crowd – we’re delighted our Monday night tv lodestone is back.

Here we speculate on plotlines we’re most looking forward to seeing dramatised:

• Spencer Matthew’s therapy sessions were a weird but very entertaining departure for the show. While television has been ignoring professional ethics since Jeremy Kyle pitched to a boardroom, Spencer’s journey as a ?character? on the reality show is the dramatic arc of this modern morality tale. It was fascinating to watch him learn about being a responsible adult last series. Whether or not he will remain emotionally mature remains to be seen. He will probably ask his therapist out.
• If you’re turning the show into a drinking game think twice before designating ?Louise Crying? a bottoms up moment. Your liver is not so robust an organ that it can handle a constant IV of alcohol.
• Rosie Fortescue will continue to remain the Lady Mary of the group and not put a genuinely classy foot wrong
• Our main ‘bois’ Oliver Proudlock and Jamie Laing will continue the greatest bromance known to our generation.
• Will Alex and our imaginary best friend Binky make it? Tabloid speculation tells us they do but no doubt the producers will throw in the occasional emotional cliffhanger. Meanwhile Lucy Watson and Jamie have been looking cosy on set despite the fact they spilt soon after that yuletide get-together. Is it just for the cameras? Most likely.
• Last time we checked in Francis was visiting Ghana, as you do. Let’s hope his African excursion influences his roster of hobbies/vague career.
• Cheska finally told off resident wagon Victoria and we hope she continues to keep her in her place. Watching a mean girl be shown up for what she is? Always amazing television.
• Mark Francis will steal every episode with a pithy and witty one-liner. We love Mark Francis putting us in our place, ?Never talk of the opera in front of those who don’t frequent it.?

The new series starts tonight at 10pm on E4.

Jeanne Sutton @jeannedesutun