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Image / Editorial

Tuesday May 20th


by Jeanne Sutton
20th May 2014

Edward Cullen Lives On In Fan Fiction Only.

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The six news stories that you #needtoknow this AM…

Sports journalist Rachel Wyse will be one of Sky Sports main correspondents during the channel’s inaugural season of GAA coverage. Wyse is already an anchor with Sky News and a columnist with the Irish Independent.

Matthew McConaughey?and Brad Pitt are New Orleans neighbours! The two discovered this cheerful celebrity fact while lounging on their balconies across from each other. Of course Brad does what any good neighbour would and throws Mr True Detective a beer. Makes a nice star-studded difference from sharing passive aggressive notes about parking and parties.

Christopher Bailey is earning all the money there ever was as the newly appointed CEO of Burberry. Bailey shall receive shares worth up to €7.6m with an annual salary of up to €8.1m a year that includes a €440,000 cash allowance to cover clothing and other items. Other items include probably more money. Talk about a golden hello.

Stateside the Jill Abramson Firing Scandal continues with the former New York Times Executive Editor finally breaking her enigmatic silence after last week’s high-profile dismissal. She spoke about resilience to the class of 2014 at Wake Forest University, ending her commencement speech with ?What’s next for me? I don’t know? so I’m in exactly the same boat as many of you!? No amount of carefully worded op-eds are going to sink this boat so we’re still waiting for a definitive explanation. The only resolution we can see at this stage is Emma Thompson starring as Jill in the Aaron-Sorkin-Tries-Feminism-scripted movie but missing out on the Best Actress Oscar to Tilda Swinton’s performance as an otter-turned-human in something from Darren Aronofsky.

Robert Pattinson has come out of what we presume is hiding to promote The Rover and Map to the Stars at Cannes. While Edward Cullen may live on in a thousand Tumblr accounts, the actor has said that there shall be no more glittering vampire reprisals. This is your cue to either weep in widows weeds or cry with joy.

This showbiz reporter managed to get ScarJo, Zac Efron, Cameron Diaz, Hugh Jackman, Samuel L Jackson AND Miss Piggy to record a wedding video for his bride-to-be.

Jeanne Sutton @jeannedesutun