30th Apr 2020
Fashion trolling has a new victim — the thong sandal
Just when you thought trainers couldn’t get more offensively hideous, the sandal steps in to take their reign. Is fashion trolling us? Between the revival of tie-dye everything, fanny packs and low-rise jeans, woundingly expensive micro-bags that you wouldn’t fit a lighter in, senior citizen sandals, Crocs and all things dad (dad jeans, dad sandals, dad shirts), and shoes with stains on them (!!!) the Emperor’s New Clothes trends prevail (is everyone joking?).
As fashion news writer Emilia Petrarca puts it, “luxury is being in on the joke. And brands are laughing all the way to the bank.”
The performance art of proudly repulsive fashion continues this summer with the chunky thong sandal. It’s like the cheap sandal you wore on your holidays when you were 14, but uglier — sturdy, bulky, platformed. All the worst words.
If you’re deep in the world of fashion’s preoccupation with the ugly shoe, you already know the sandal I’m talking about. It’s the Ginza leather sandal by The Row, at the preposterous price of €780.
I hate that I love them.
Look, don’t come crying to me about it, I don’t make the rules. Take it up with the influencers.
I’ve put together an edit of the most hideous ones I could find and a selection of influencers wearing them if you still need convincing. I know, I know. The joke is on us.
Shop our edit of chunky thong sandals below.
Photography by @monikh.
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