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The wines you should *actually* order in the pub, according to a pro

The wines you should *actually* order in the pub, according to a pro


by Hannah Crosbie
03rd May 2024

How does one navigate the murky waters of your local pub’s pint sized wine list? Scottish wine personality and writer Hannah Crosbie—who’s new book Corker has just hit the shelves—weighs in.

Just how do you dodge this minefield of sh*t wine? I’ve taken it upon myself to do the research, inspecting the wine ‘list’ (although I fear ‘list’ may be an altogether far too generous description) of every chain pub I’ve been into in the last year.

There are many independent pubs with fabulous wine lists, being built lovingly by independent owners. This isn’t for those places, where you’ll no doubt find something brilliant to feast on. Many of the chain establishments are yet to catch up. This page is advice for those places. Many wine people who go to pubs feel this way. Pickings are slim, and we don’t want to ask the well meaning landlord exactly what he means when he says he has “red or white”.

Most of the time, we just end up having a beer. But what about when you don’t want a beer, what if you are dead set on having wine, you just want one that tastes good?

The fact is, pubs are part of our DNA. They are as British as baked beans and not going to therapy. They are also the first place that many of us unknowingly start our wine journeys.

Many a trembly-voiced first wine order has taken place in British pubs, for those of us who aren’t lucky enough to have parents with cellars full of Lafite. Here’s how to hack the pub wine list.

INDOORS

Many of the pubs I grew up near did not have the luxury of a beer garden. They were cramped, carpeted places with low wooden beams and friendly faces. They were places to hide in after a particularly long walk, or reconvene with old school friends at Christmas time. Places that come into their own in the winter months, with a real fire and a packet of cheese and onion crisps to share with friends. When you’re indoors, you require something similarly festive and warming.

MERLOT

What puts me off the most in cheap pub wine is the sugar content. So, I think for the pub order, it has to be a red. And Merlot was by far the most popular red I found in the places I visited. Plummy, ripe Merlot, from the Old and New World. For me, white wines are way too obviously sugary, so much so that it distracts from any kind of varietal bouquet. Red comes in at around 0.9g of sugar per serving, whereas white wine can be around 1.4g.

Can’t find it? Try…

I also encountered many Malbecs on my journey around the country’s pubs. So, if there’s a Malbec there instead, go for that. A similarly smooth, jammy wine with notes ranging from raspberry to blackberry, depending on how hot the climate is. Plus, it’s a no brainer if you’re going for steak and chips.

Colour:

Red.

Notable regions:

Bordeaux, California, Chile, Australia, Hungary.

On the label:

‘New world’ countries such as California and Australia will be more likely to display ‘Merlot’ on the label. Bordeaux, where it’s commonly part of a blend, will only state the name of the château or the appellation on the label.

OUTDOORS

The outdoors pub is an altogether different beast. It’s more sociable, busier, and scientifically ten times more likely to result in a Deliveroo McDonalds at 11am the next morning. There’s still a way to dodge overly sugary wines here, you just need to seek out a wine with a bracing acidity and notes of citrus to cut through the noise.

PINOT GRIGIO

I find that with a Pinot Grigio, no matter what the quality, there’s a real sense of refreshment that comes from the bone-dryness, and there doesn’t tend to be that much residual sugar, even if it’s on the cheaper side.

Can’t find it? Try…

My next suggestion would be a standard Sauvignon Blanc, another white wine that the pub is sure to have. If they don’t just have a beer.

Colour:

White.

Notable regions:

Italy.

On the label:

Most Italian Pinot Grigio will state this on the label.

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