Real Weddings: Maria and Neil’s charming DIY wedding in Co Kildare

THE PROPOSAL
We got engaged on January 3, 2024, in Venice, Italy (one of my favourite cities!) after being together for almost four years. Neil proposed using a shell he had found on the beach the day before in Lido. I collect shells everywhere I go, and Neil knew this one would become extra special! It was a perfectly imperfect one.

We found the only bridge in the city with no parapets (sides) called the Ponte Chiodo, went to the local island of Murano to a glasswork workshop, bought a lovely piece of art in glass and had a fantastic day. After dinner with cocktails, Neil suggested we go for a walk to take in the city at night. I didn’t notice us walking back to Ponte Chiodo, where Neil popped the question and proposed with the beautiful shell he had found the day before. I was so shocked I didn’t even hear him, and he had to ask again!

The following day, we went ring shopping. I chose a Giorgio Visconti Italian-designed rose gold cluster ring in Venice’s San Marco Square.

THE WEDDING ATTIRE
My dress was from Essence of Australia, an off-the-shoulder A-line lace dress I bought in Jeutonic Bridal in Killkenny. My cathedral-length veil was handmade, and I wore bespoke custom-made earrings by goldsmith Alan Dalton in Dungarvan; they had pearl detail and subtle textures of the faint ripples across waves. Alan also made our wedding bands – mine is an 18-carat rose gold and diamond curved band that fits my engagement ring. Neil’s ring was also 18-carat rose gold.

Neil wore a custom-made black tux from Louis Copeland. The trimming inside was Van Gogh’s “Starry Night” inspired, and Neil had it customised further with our names on the inner lapel and his surname under the collar in yellow thread. He wore a gold vintage Omega pocketwatch. We both wore Parfums de Marly scents – I had Delina, and Neil chose Althiar.

THE CEREMONY
We always knew we wanted a church ceremony as Gaeilge. Fr. Ger Ahern, a good family friend of Neill’s family, was our celebrant. Carlow Cathedral was a beautiful location for our ceremony, and having Fr. Ger was a huge part in making our day special and celebrating everything dear to us… family, friends, language, art, music. Aoibhe Devereux, a fifth-year art student at our school, designed our beautiful mass booklets.

My son Noah walked me up the aisle to Love is A Compass. We lit a candle, and I wore a Las Mo Shlí compass bracelet to remember my father and family who have passed. The compass was also an important nod to the coast and sea, and funnily enough, a compass always points to N – Neil & Noah! Before the ceremony, Neil and his groomsmen went to Tully’s Bar (family owned) in Carlow Town and sat in the mustard yellow armchairs that once belonged to their departed grandparents and took a few moments to gather themselves for the day ahead!

Our music was provided by the amazing harpist and singer Orla Fallon, who sang as Gaeilge, accompanied by our friend Sarah O Gorman, another notable musician on fiddle. After communion, Dearán Ó Droma sang In Eireann Ni Neosainn Ce Hi and Neil’s brother Seán read a beautiful poem. Our friends and talented musicians from Meánscoil San Nioclás surprised us by playing to finish our ceremony and to play us out of the cathedral.

THE RECEPTION
We had an amazing day at Kilkea Castle! We had a fabulous cocktail reception with espresso martinis, bramble and blood orange margaritas alongside afternoon tea with canapes and, of course, lots of bubbles. Even the drizzle of rain we had didn’t dampen our spirits. Neil’s parents also had their wedding reception here, so it was extra special. Sinéad, Shannon and all the staff at Kilkea Castle were incredible. Everyone was such a pleasure to deal with and have around on the day, and we felt right at home.

We had our menu tasting three months out from the wedding, and it was nothing short of incredible – the chef presented each dish to us personally, giving us insight into the dish and returning for feedback. We tasted the wines and the cocktails and had such a beautiful day.

THE ENTERTAINMENT
Our band was The Bentley Boys, and they kept the dance floor full from the first to the last song. We chose the six-piece band and had a DJ with Sax and Drums to follow.

THE DECOR
We planned everything ourselves – in true teacher stereotype, I have a thing for planning and organising, while Neil has a thing for golf, so it worked out well. We created placenames using oyster shells we gathered on the Cunnigar in An Rinn. My art students helped me decoupage them in floral patterns in colours corresponding to our flowers and used calligraphic names for each guest. These were a real talking point. We also had individual thank you cards at each place setting. Some fourth-year students also made beautiful candles in oyster shells for us to add to the array of peach and pink and ivory candles that flickered all night in the Baronial hall.

We also added lots of other details ourselves, including designing and making our wedding invitations and the wax seals. We had many ‘make and do’ evenings in our house around the kitchen table, sticking and pasting things together and packing tiny, personalised confetti pouches with dried flower petals. We also created lovely personalised sweet tubs for the sweet station with Lily O’Brien’s chocolate love hearts on them.

We set up a photo station with two Polaroid cameras and had a fabulous guest book – the cover was designed and hand-painted by Róisín Ní Arta (another one of my art students)! She created an amazing image in acrylic paint of Kilkea Castle, and we can’t wait to display it in our new house.

THEIR TOP TIPS
The day is about the two of you! Have fun, take your time with the planning and incorporate as many special little touches as you can that are meaningful reminders to you both (ie preserved flower items, personalised Moet bottle, guestbook, wedding candles). Create as many keepsakes as you can that will allow you to relive the day over the years. We are also going to send all our wedding cards to be preserved in a photo book and have a hardback coffee table book made that includes all the photographs of the day.