25th Nov 2019
It’s nearly December, which means gift planning is in overdrive. However a significant number of mothers are planning not to gift their partner this year – here’s why
It’s that time of year, where the distant feeling of panic begins to creep into our daily lives.
It’s a slow burn. It’s sparked after the Halloween decorations are taken down and becomes an inferno once Christmas FM hits the airwaves.
It’s the present-buying crisis. Parents all over the country are in stealth mode searching for the elusive ‘it’ toy, while new lovers are panic-buying copious amounts of perfume sets. However, for those in long-term relationships and marriages with children, presents are being forgotten about completely.
According to new research commissioned by FUJIFILM, over half (53%) of parents are planning not to buy their partner a present this Christmas.
Apparently it comes down to three main factors.
The first is money. After purchasing presents for children and extended family and the annual festive food shop, the piggy bank is short of pennies. According to 48% of mothers, there just isn’t enough disposable income left to spend on their partner.
The second is inspiration. Twenty-seven per cent of mothers in the survey said the difficulty was buying for someone who ‘has everything’ and ‘does not need anything’. So, the best option is to not buy at all.
The third is time. With mothers taking on the majority of tasks during the festive period, it’s no wonder that time is a roadblock. Twenty-five per cent said they just don’t have the spare hours to buy a gift for their partner or spouse.
Expert Laura Erskine has advice for both mothers and fathers who are putting their partners and themselves last on their to-do list saying: “Choosing not to buy your other half a gift this Christmas may seem like the easy option this year, especially when done on the basis of a joint pact.
“However, I would advise parents to think very carefully about what this says about the health of your relationship, and what message this sends your children.”
Children are perceptive to almost everything and seeing parents not giving gifts to one another can cause insecurities. “You must remember that your children will be watching and take pleasure out of seeing the two most important people in their lives, gift to each other on Christmas morning.
“Similarly, the lack of a gift to one another may cause anxiety or upset around the security of their family unit.”
She warns of the impact it can have on a partner when they see the gift-giver purchase presents for everyone but them: “When a relationship is under strain, the lack of a gift or indeed a poorly thought out gift tends to take on symbolic proportions where the recipient believes their partner doesn’t care for them as much as they used to.”
However, when a present is given and received – no matter how small it may be – there is an instant positive impact. “Likewise, when your other half nails your gift, irrespective of how much money was spent on it, you tend to feel loved and connected to your mate.”
Over 1,172 mums were surveyed in relation to Christmas gifting plans this year. FUJIFILM research conducted by the online parenting community MummyPages.ie. The fieldwork was carried out in October 2019.
Read more: Things Fall Apart: let’s talk about the words we use, and those we don’t use when it comes to parenting
Read more: 5 simple ways to avoid overspending this Christmas
Read more: The ultimate Christmas movie? 15 things you may not know about Love Actually
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