Obsessed with your horoscope? Or maybe you are just beginning to believe in the stars? Here are five of the best internet horoscopes to get your daily fix
Horoscopes were once confined to the back pages of newspaper supplements and seen only as post-watershed TV ads.
However, in the year 2020, they are experiencing a revival of sorts. Why? Well, there are a series of factors. In an increasingly disruptive and upsetting world, horoscopes act as a sort of reprieve from the discombobulation. The terrors of our political climate and the worsening effects of global warming mean we are at a point in history where we have no idea what is actually going to happen to us or our world.
The Mystic Megs of the universe are our modern saviours. Generationally we are less religious but we are becoming more spiritual. So while we don’t necessarily believe in the man with the beard who lives in the clouds, we praise the woman with a talent for astrology who lives above a dodgy Chinese takeaway.
Personally, I have an intense adoration for horoscopes. As a teenager, I scoured each and every magazine for my zodiac fix which I believed to be true. If the planetary alignment was telling me to stay indoors, you can be sure that I was trying to persuade my mother to let me take a day off school.
My intense love has made me an expert in the area, which is why I am sharing my top 5 best internet horoscopes.
Week of 12/1 in Capricorn: You will ask so many questions. Now might be the time to write the memories down. When it’s time open the windows wide. Turn the lights on very brightly.
— Astro Poets (@poetastrologers) December 2, 2019
The Astro Poets Twitter page was launched in 2016 by Alex Dimitrov and Dorothea Lasky and since then has become a cultural phenomenon. The horoscopes are written in poetry form and feel almost like a riddle but what makes them extra special is that it feels like it was written just for you. The tweets can be confusing but the lovely people of Twitter translate the musings into plain English.
I hadn’t been aware of Susan Miller (of Astrology Zone fame) until a work colleague recommended her to me while I mused about my zodiac favourites. Now, she is my favourite. On astrologyzone.com I discovered an in-depth nine-page look at my soul. Everything Susan said about my past was true – I even got emotional at the relevance of her words.
She may be brilliant but Susan doesn’t come without controversy. Some of her fans aren’t impressed with her punctuality (or lack thereof). One look at Twitter and you will see the visceral anger held by her devotees when their monthly horoscopes are late (which they frequently are).
me to susan miller when astrologyzone is late posting monthly horoscopes pic.twitter.com/cCwZrRcga7
— niina pollari (@heartbarf) December 1, 2019
and also for The Witch, susan miller, to be on time with dec horoscopes
— discourse wallah (@krutika) December 1, 2019
However, if you are ok with your horoscope readings being late then Susan is the one for you.
Co-Star Personalized Astrology
Co-Star is the Ritz Carlton of the astrology world. Using data gathered from NASA and professional astrologers, the app gives highly personal readings which use your place and time of birth as references. You can also follow live updates of planetary alignments and movement of the stars. The app can be tricky to navigate but the personalisation provided makes up for it.
— Milk ? (@milkstrology) December 2, 2019
If you want in-depth, culturally focused and funny horoscopes, there is no better Twitter account than at Milkstrology. Taking a light-hearted approach to all things astrological, the account is the best place to both laugh and cry at the effects the planets have on us lowly humans.
not all geminis (@notallgeminis)
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Astrology meme accounts have taken over Instagram and I love it. Both funny and highly insightful, these are perfect when you want to avoid the zodiac jargon. The Instagram account @notallgeminis is cut-throat – at first, you will feel seen but then you will cringe at your idiosyncrasies. If you don’t fully trust or believe in the magic of the planets, then this account if the perfect starter before you move onto the main course.
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