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How seriously do you take your horoscopes? Just-for-fun morning reads, or a detailed guide on how to live your life? We’ve noticed that there’s been a big resurgence in horoscope love these days – our inboxes are constantly flooded with zodiac-related content, but how accurate could it actually be? Two of our IMAGE staffers put their horoscopes to the test, looking back on what was predicted for August and whether it came true, or was just another wishy-washy prophecy.
Erin Lindsay, IMAGE.ie content creator, and Édaein O’Connell, social media intern, both looked up their horoscopes on well-loved zodiac site astrologyzone.com, run by acclaimed astrologer Susan Miller. They had a look at what the site predicted for their signs for August, including finances, relationships, friendships and careers, and weighed up how accurate it all came to be. Spoiler alert: it’s a mixed bag.
Related: Why are people so obsessed with horoscopes lately?
I am definitely a closet horoscope fiend. I love to be the picture of cynicism and logic in public, but inside my brain, it’s all tarot cards and birthstones. I’m a Cancer, which generally means I’m an emotional mess. The skies tell me that I am sentimental, loyal, sympathetic, family-oriented, deeply loving and emotional (the good stuff), and can be very moody, pessimistic, insecure, impatient or manipulative (the not so good stuff). In general, that is me to a tee. I don’t think I’m manipulative but my mood is easily changeable, and I’m definitely impatient and a bit insecure. The good stuff, I heavily identify with – relationships and loyalty are big priorities for me, and I’m endlessly empathetic to other people, sometimes to my detriment. I’m basically the poster child for the Cancer sign, so my horoscope should be as accurate as can be (detect the sarcasm).
Susan Miller’s readings for me this month were a bit depressing – it almost all centred around my financial situation. Apparently, Mars has been in Aquarius (my eighth house – yeah I don’t know either) since May and will continue to be there until November, which is throwing my money down the drain. I knew it wasn’t just me with all those ASOS deliveries.
It’s more fun to look at what was true in my horoscope, so let’s do that first. Money has definitely been on my mind this month, and all the talk about finances did strike a chord. Apparently, August was set to be a very slow month for me that required patience, especially when it comes to work and careers. It wasn’t set to be a good month for new launches, big agreements or new endeavours, but rather to look back and reflect on previous work. This makes a lot of sense for me – I started off the month with a few days’ holidays and ended up being really sick for a week afterwards. It was frustrating because I couldn’t get things done at work, and it brought out that Cancer impatience, but it did give me time to relax and organise myself head-wise. Apparently, from next week on, I can expect my “efforts to be recognised” and things will click back into place, so I’m excited about that.
For the not-so-true stuff, there was plenty of that too. I did not discover that I needed an urgent medical procedure. I did not find a ‘new source of income’ on August 11th – the full-time job is plenty, thanks! Apparently, this weekend sees the most ‘breathtakingly romantic’ full moon of the season and says I’ll be travelling for love. I won’t be seeing my boyfriend this weekend at all, so maybe it means the rom-coms I’ll be watching instead. I also apparently have a big deadline coming up on August 26th – doesn’t ring any bells, so if my editor is reading this, please don’t kill me if I’ve forgotten (Editor’s note: no deadline has been missed).
All in all, Susan Miller’s reading was interesting but it was a bit too in-depth and repetitive for me. Sure, there was a lot that resonated, but when you keep things vague, they tend to resonate with lots of people. That Cancer pessimist is out again.
Sometimes I let the power of horoscopes rule the day. I am a Capricorn through and through – determined, ambitious and practical- so what the stars tell me can’t be anything but true. Horoscopes are like Seamus Heaney poetry; you have to discover the hidden meanings written between the lines.
Susan Miller, the horoscope reader extraordinaire, tells me that the second lunar eclipse marks an ending or change in my income, which is weird because I just quit my second job. I am broke. She tells me not to panic – OK Susan I won’t. A new source of income is on its way. Great, that must be why I was just about to download the Paddy Power app. She tells me I am in transition from one lifestyle to another. Well, Susan, I have been thinking about starting yoga so you might be right. Susan says that the pieces of my life puzzle are hard to put in place, but I have a bounty of patience in my resources. Well, that’s dandy, while I try to get a grip on things, I have a lifelong pass to the waiting room of life.
Her observation that I pair patience with realistic expectations is the absolute truth. I never allow my expectations to get to a point where disappointment can make an entrance. My hopes and dreams will never become anything but realistic. Before I let my hopes run riot, I like to pair it back with a good slap of realism.
The planets have gone rogue, of course, but if I move slowly, the fog in my life will lift. I like to think that this fog is my thesis. A life zapping slug which I can’t seem to shift. She tells me that September is the right time to start new ventures. Where will I find the time Susan? But, Mars won’t be at full blast for these ventures until the 8th of October. Funnily enough, that is the week after my submission date. Obviously, the planets are trying to tell me it’s the perfect time to start writing my autobiography. If so, I may have to give Susan a call.