We've reached the stage of boredom where Woodies reopening has been treated like a festival launch

With phase one of lockdown lifting today, it seems the reopening of large DIY stores like Woodies has been the one change that really has the Irish public talking.


May 18 2020 will go down as the day in history that we all started to get a little reprieve from lockdown. We can now travel up to 5km from home, meet up with a friend outdoors, and even play a few sports like golf and tennis.

However, the thing that is getting most people talking isn't any of these new-found freedoms, but instead the fact that hardware stores like Woodies have been allowed to open. The buzz has been akin to the launch of a hot new festival, with barriers set up and crowds descending.

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Barriers were erected outside stores yesterday in anticipation of the queues of people that would descend, weeks of pent-up DIY projects bubbling inside them. Just think of the paint they'd be able to buy, the hedge clippers, the barbecue accessories: all those things that would be the key to the perfect isolation life that they had been missing out on. Just like the golden era of Oxegen, this was truly an experience worth queuing for.

Sure enough, some images and reports of queues outside stores have emerged, but for every person that made their way to Woodies this morning, there were at least three who had a hot take on the fact that they dared to do so.

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Just like those who complain about the 'young people' at every festival — too many, too loud, too drunk — so too have the complaints rolled in about Woodies attendees. What do they need in Woodies anyway? Have they nothing better to do? I wouldn't have any interest in that sort of thing. Much more enjoyable, however, have been the jokes arising online.

Twitter user @ParamitePies riffed on the festival-like queues for the hardware store with this hilarious 'lineup', featuring some excellent DIY puns, as well as a few of lockdown's greatest hits, including Zoom quizzes and sourdough starter. If this was actually what we'd find through the doors of Woodies, I'd already be in the queue.

This screenshot from @Viriconia also made us chuckle, with not even Jesus Christ himself getting as much attention as Woodies' reopening. If that's not something the listeners of Joe Duffy will want to complain about, I'm not sure what is.

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There were plenty of people ready to poke fun at those who were queuing up to buy DIY supplies, but in the multi-layered world of the internet, there were of course people also poking fun at those people.

And hilariously, Frank Coughlan reminded us all that although buying the DIY supplies is an important first step, it is no guarantee of actually completing the DIY projects.

Perhaps the Irish have a deep-rooted love for home projects, perhaps we just love to complain, or perhaps lockdown has just lowered our threshold for what's considered interesting, but Woodies has certainly been the subject on everyone's mind. At least if we can't have our festivals this summer, the Woodies hype is letting us reminisce.

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