I wanna be where the food trends aren't.
The Internet is responsible for some crazy things.
In a world where anything remotely healthy but more importantly aesthetic enough to be Instagrammed in a Nutribullet or as a topping on overnight oats is a 'superfood' and where you'd be hard pushed to not have one fitfam friend, at?the epicentre of it all, rising like a phoenix from the ashes of fake news and Kardashians is an Internet persona who, with the right amount of filters and followers, made a career as a 'Food Stylist' and is bringing the whole world frothing at the mouth over a food trend that is now being known as - #MermaidToast.
Your eyes might be happier than your stomach. Mermaid toast is made from all natural ingredients and dyes and uses cream cheese, food colouring, gold leaf and hashtag magic to bring you what was once cheese on toast.
26 year old food stylist Adeline Waugh used ?a variety of blue-green algae powders and liquids mixed with almond milk cream cheese to create this ocean inspired toast?, which may not sound appetising, but you know, algae is rich in magnesium and iron.
This is not a new phenomenon. We have also had #UnicornToast.
It's not fair to blame Adeline for the warped culture of social media - she's come under some fire and really, she's just doing her job, and quite well by today's standards - she's got 47.5k followers on Instagram.
47.5k people who give a mermaid about how she organises berries. And organic, gluten-free, sugar-free, vegan, paleo and whatever-else-we're-supposed-to-be-free-from sweet potatoes and avocados.
On a side note, do you think of our collective affinity for mythical creatures like unicorns and mermaids is from the lack of a divine and mystical nature in our animalistic culture? Then we bastardized that too and plastered unicorns and mermaids on phone cases and make up bags and then we paved paradise and put up a parking lot? Hey, lemme know in the comments below.
But sure look, isn't mermaid toast just another way to engage in social media comparison culture, with an adolescent "my toast is better than your toast?" And isn't it pretty.
Food trends are increasingly based on health, convenience, indulgence and the environment but there's undeniably a growing culture of camera cuisine.
Who could have predicted the commodification of the seasons that became the viral sensation that is the Starbucks Christmas cup or the Pumpkin Spice Latte? Starbucks has also announced it will be releasing limited spring cups to really get you into the spirit of April.
According to the New York Times in January, at Pinterest, which is used by 150 million people a month, Buddha bowls filled with simple vegan or vegetarian ingredients are among the top items that users post. Pinterest users are also into naan pizza, zucchini chips and octopus cooked at home. "The overarching trend we are seeing is along vegan, gluten-free and clean eating,? Stephanie Kumar, head of what Pinterest calls ?category insights? told the New York Times.
In terms of 2017 food trends, do you even influence if you didn't know purple cauliflower was the It vegetable of 2017? Horseradish, spirulina, Asian-inspired breakfasts, jackfruit, sorghum, harissa and other foods you can't pronounce are also coming to a carefully Facebook-algorithim-curated fake-news-feed near you.
Also according to the New York Times, next year will bring more focus on foods that help with detoxification, weight loss and relaxation. That's right - hygge foods. You heard it here first. My own personal hashtag hygge meal is Domino's cookies and a Pepperoni Passion.