There’s a grave misconception surrounding the fundamentals of Christmas party dressing. Despite many of us having to change en masse in the office toilets before heading out to any organized entertainment, we insist, nay demand, that the seasonal sartorial terrain be clad with scratchy sequins, abbreviated hemlines and heels that require a blood alcohol limit test.
Why? We all know how it ends: shoes in one hand; dignity in the other. Assuming you haven’t snogged Craig from accounts, the blisters of bad choices will still ring in your ears like Cliff Richard on repeat. Fancy an alternative? Of course you do.
Let’s talk practicality. Rather than viewing the lesser known yuletide virtue as a kill joy, consider the possibilities. Pair a bang-on-trend tux jacket with a velvet body con dress, opaque tights and natty brogues. Slick back that hair and bam - `80s revival with a side of happy feet. We like.
Tight on time? A daywear jumpsuit, oversized clutch and New Balance trainers say cool and credible. Save the sparkle for your maquillage and embellish those tresses with Umberto Giannini Glam Hair Glamour Puss Crystal Mist for a touch of iridescence.
Desperate to wear that Funky Christmas Jumper? Pair yours with a full circle taffeta skirt, crystal collar and block heels for a look that’s retro; not ironic. Sorry hipsters…
Before you blast me for being a style Scrooge, ask yourself why they call it the Silly Season? I’m not suggesting you sit in the corner like a pathetic Poinsettia (that’s Christmas for wallflower). Perish the thought. I just think decking the halls is best left to interiors; not festive fashion. Boughs of holly don’t really cut it on a dance floor…
Tux jacket, H&M, €39.95 in stores now // Velvet dress, H&M, €29.95 in stores now // Derby brogues, Whistles, €155 // Karl Lagerfeld studded-collar jersey and poplin jumpsuit, Net-a-Porter.com, €220 // Check jumpsuit, Asos.com, €75.34 // New Balance 420 black/grey trainers, Asos.com, €75.34 // Oversized clutch, & Other Stories, £135; €163.04 approx //
Annmarie O'Connor @aocdotme