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5 Things We Can Stop Doing Now It’s September

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Making plans to attend open-air cinema events. Damp picnic blankets are not remotely cute and those tinfoil sheets you get from the emergency services cannot be picked up in a Tesco just five minutes from the park. Give us a cineplex and bag of overpriced M&Ms any evening.

Florals. Cocoon yourself in cashmere, or it’s more affordable cousin merino, for the foreseeable future. Think burgundy, forest green, all those autumnal shades that make our celtic skin shine forth, nothing that suggests your aunt dressed you for a family wedding. However, if your florals are from Simone Rocha’s new London boutique, feel free to disregard our rant.

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Bare legs all the time. Nights out, yes. Commuting to work, stick with the trousers or opaque tights. As we hit the season to which our body temperature is fully accustomed, we can skip the grooming time that goes on keeping our limbs sleek and shiny and dedicate time to all those American fall shows invading our television screens.

Overpriced cocktails. Who actually wants a mimosa? Give us the poor man’s champagne straight from the bottle or not at all. As the spectre of summer quickly fades, red wine and hot whiskey are finally acceptable tipples. And the latter is practically patriotic.

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Organising trips to festivals/seaside food festivals/someone’s holiday home in Wexford. It’s freezing. I’m wearing a polo neck. You can no longer dismiss the fact I’m committed to paying my credit card debt with the excuse of blink and you’ll miss it sunshine. No one ever wants to spend a fraction of a Saturday in an Applegreen.

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